What happens when we dont wait

I was bored

Sick of the world

So bored I could eat myself.

I was tired of waiting and hoping

For the fantasy prince of my dreams

So I gave my heart to a lad with butterfingers

So I shouldn’t have been surprised when he let it slip from his fingers

And to the floor into a thousand pieces

For what we had was almost love I believed

He was sorta kinda right and sorta kinda wrong

So I stuck to his short lived compliments

Of “sweet empty nothings”

And when everything took that wrong turn

The agony was priceless

I swallowed up my cries at night so no one would hear

I buried my head in my pillow to hide the tears.

For I brought this upon myself

And I was gutless so I wouldn’t leave

I hoped for someone to notice

I was quiet but screaming inside

“Cant anyone see I’m hurting!”

My misery ended

With that black and white revelation I remember

A mucky figure

Running blindly and half hazardly with fear

From an image in form of a ghost

It took a while for me to realize

That that message was for me

So I took to my heels and ran.

1st of march writings

I would rather be alone in this world

Than have so many people and still feel so alone

I would prefer not to feel

than have all these feelings and still feel empty

I would prefer to own nothing

Than lose everything

I would rather not remember

Than have so  many memories that would make me hurt inside.

I would rather be alone in this world

Than love and not be loved

Than worry for the ones I hold dear

Than fear always for tomorrow

Than grieve for the ones I have lost.

There is so much evil in this world.

We are stronger facing them alone

Than have family and loose them

Or have friends that are enemies

Or love someone that loves another

I would rather be alone in this world.