- It takes patience to endure,
to understand, and to contain whatever that happens in a marriage.
- “One thing I’ve discovered
in this marriage thing is that blood is thicker than love. Maintain a good
relationship with your siblings; they would have your back no matter what.
If I want a straight forward advice I go to Vickie or Helen, not my
husband. I mean, you can marry a man today, give him your life, your
devotion, your everything, and one day he wakes up to leave, and you’ll be
alone, with his kids to cater for”.
- A marriage that has God as
its foundation will never fail.
- Marriage, for some girls
is the highest accomplishment, bearing your man children makes you a
complete woman, keeping your home and your marriage together, is another
ball game.
- You cannot depend on love
to sustain a marriage.
THE ADEWUYIS.
They were in love when they had
gotten married. They had been in love since they were in the university. The
kind of love that convinces you to get married. They were both yorubas, so it was
not a problem, their parents had known each other. It was a blessed union. I think
their love died the moment Mrs. Adewuji transformed from the slender figure she
once was when they had gotten married into an enormous being, with extra-large
hips and folds everywhere. Having five kids does that to you I guess. Her
husband felt pain, that what he paid bride price for years ago was gone. He
thought about it every night when she came to bed and occupied most of the
space or how their bed sank in when she lay on it. She never stopped eating
though. She fried chicken and consumed two wings while just making the food. So
he chose to work longer hours to make it bearable to deal with a marriage he no
longer wanted. That was when he began to notice his secretary, Anita who was
slender and light skinned, her skin glowed under the florescent of the office. Anita
was nice; she wore tight shorts skirts and dresses to show off her good legs,
she let him have a good view of her cleavage and bent down a lot till he felt
he could almost see his target. He would never cheat on his unattractive wife
still but Anita came on to him that night and he found himself slamming into
her while she was bent on his table. It was the most amazing thing that had
happened to him in a long time. They went on like this, he would have her on
his desk the way he wanted, they would have drinks and laugh about everything, he
would organize business trips to have them go away together till he wanted to
have the life he had with her permanently. He left his wife and five kids to
move in with Anita and never looked back. He blames his wife to this day for
the failure of their marriage.
THE
OKAFORS.
Mr. Okafor was a wealthy man and an
elder in the church. The early morning and night devotions in his house were
compulsory. He didn’t joke with matters concerning the spiritual life of his
family. Like the time he stripped his daughter naked and lashed her repeatedly in
the front of the rest of the family for bringing shame to his name because she
was texting in church and was told by an usher to put away her phone. Mrs. Okafor was the head of the women’s union
in the church, she encouraged women devote more time to God and He would take
care of their marriages, her marriage being a wonderful example. Their new maid
Ndidi was a catholic always praying her rosary even in her sleep. Her voice was
the loudest whenever they had devotions, singing almost aggressively and
dancing till she was sweating profusely. She sang in the same way, but a
different song when Mr. Okafor was fucking her. For a Christian girl she knew how
well God commanded a woman to please a man, whining provocatively on Mr. Okafor.
She had the most wonderful body beneath her big clothes and skirts, the first
time Mr. Okafor instructed her to take her clothes off, his mouth went dry as
he watched her unveil the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. So during Mrs.
Okafor’s women’s’ church meetings, her husband helped himself with their sizzling
maid till she got pregnant with his child. The expression on Mrs. Okafor’s face
was second to none when the maid confessed that it was her husband, not some
area boy, not the driver or the gate man that had impregnated her.
THE OGAHS.
Getting married at 35 was perceived
to be different sorts of wrong. A girl at that point would be seen as a failure.
It had taken her so long to find love, to get married. Her mother had said all
sorts of things to her back then and somehow, Mrs. Ogah wanted to go back to
that time just so she would never have gotten married. A woman is blamed for so
many things, topping the list is when she cannot bear children. She had gone to every church, drank all sorts
of potions to make her womb fertile for her husband’s seed. She thought about
whether she ever really wanted a child or she just wanted to disappoint
everyone and prove she was woman enough to have her own child. She knew there
was the emptiness in her marriage, the number of words her husband spoke to her
reduced daily. He wouldn’t even touch
her, there was no use wasting his semen on a barren woman. Her in-laws stormed
into her home occasionally to ridicule her and call her names. She couldn’t dare to return home, her mother
would have a fit. So she stayed and endured. He started drinking. Maybe to
forget he was married to her, she couldn’t tell. She tried to please him. She
prepared the most delicious meals for him, meals he didn’t bother eating. He just ignored her, went about the house like
she was not even there. The silence drove her to madness. The kind of madness that
gave her the courage to confront him. And that was when he released everything
he had stored up inside on her. The hatred, resentment and anger. She tried feebly to protect herself from his
blow. He left her unconscious on the ground in the pool of her own blood. He chased her out of his house that week and
brought in the village girl his mother married for him.
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